Week of the Mushroom

An excerpt from A Treatise on the Religious Customs of Trans-Serengeti Box Creatures:

It is time for the mushroom-worshipping ceremony today. Last week was the Week of the Carrot, and the week before that was Week of the Nettle, so it’s abundantly obvious that this week is the Week of the Mushroom. That’s simply the way it works around here. It’s an incredibly straightforward system of worship, really, compared to what I’ve seen other species do. And when you have as many deities as the box-creatures (since all things that come up out of the Sacred Dirt contain spirits and are thus deities, at least in their eyes), it is easiest to simply assign each of them a week and worship them in turn. Worshipping them all at once would get too tiring, and box-creatures are inherently lazy, as everyone knows. This way, none of the spirits of the Sacred Dirt get mad, because they all receive the same amount of worship, and none of the box-creatures get tired out by appeasing more than one deity at a time. No one knows how many years it takes to go through a full cycle of Sacred Dirt worship, since there are an awful lot of plants (and none of the box-creatures have ever bothered to try and keep track — as previously stated, they’re inherently lazy), but that isn’t really the point. And calendars are pesky nuisances anyways. Best to take it week by week. Now, genuflect to the mushroom unless you want to incur its wrath.